Where are you from Udayaravichandrika?

Lot of people ask me. I am from Bangalore. I speak Kannada.

So what will happen to you?

It still uncertain. Things have become more and more complicated for me. It’s just too overwhelming for me. My health is not so good, it deteriorated and I don’t know what to do. With everybody testing on me, my health is deteriorated. For all of you it’s a big joke. It’s taken long and my relationship with Ryan might end (since he or my parents are unable to handle me), I might not be there. I don’t know what to do where to go. There are very high chances I might go back to my home town. So nothing is sure. This journey might end to Ravichandrika soon, may be break up with Ryan and go back. Thanks to all of you for testing on me. Oops sorry I said Thanks.


Have fun

I hope everybody had lots of fun out of my life.

Did you have a good laugh????

Yes, who doesn’t love gossip, we all want gossip unless it is not on us.

After St. Nicholas, the gossip is on The highly successfully married with a perfect family, highly charming, hihly educated, oh by the way he wants a stage name??? Oh my, should I give the great personality a name? You already have one, but still if I have to…

#define The highly successfully married, highly charming, highly educated      Rackesh

I hope you liked your name..

So after St. Nicholas, I am a big gossip with Rackesh, the great man.

Oh by the way it’s going to be 5 years in 4 months. And yeah congratulations to me…. I am back on my medications..oh yes but then we have money………………….i just hope i will not lose Ryan in this long time comedy show…


Miss Communication

How do I communicate with the virtual world?

Well, there are lot of bugs in my apartment, placed everywhere in living room, bed room, kitchen, rest room.It so happens that when I am watching TV, listening to music, cooking, observing some thing, reading something there’s a ‘tick tick’ sound – I am not sure where exactly they are planted. Or there’s a car horn outside or a neighbor makes some sound. Even the refrigerator is bugged – it starts and stops at a particular dialogue.

This is how I communicate with you all and of course with those who must not be named. Now my brain should guess who is sending the message, which group and who?. It gets very stressful. So I do not like you guys convey anything anymore. It’s almost clear for me and for all of you I suppose. I do not wish to receive anything from the people.

But then it does not stop. It gets very stressful for my brain. Well, Ryan also sends message from He who must not be named. There’s a romantic scene, love message – ‘tick tick tick tick’ or Ryan moves his legs, hands. This has been going on for more than 4 years and my super brain is tired.

It is not restricted to just my apartment but also work, public places and practically every where I go. At work – there’s beeping sounds – coworkers – sending messages from those who must not be named.

Do I like it? No. I am tired. It triggers me.

How do I reply? By writing in a notepad or phone (oh yes phone speaks) or oh yes I speak up. I wonder when did my life get so complicated? When did I get into this situation.

So did I like the surprise gift? Not completely – it changed  the course of my life.

“Don’t come out, we will deny we know you as you have no proof”- says who? The charming and highly successful people’s favorite leader and those people who must not be named.

My brain goes kaput. I am tired. Thanks for all the care but how long does this go on?

Sometimes to think that I am like an island itself is so suffocating.

Oh I can’t handle this. How long before I totally give up…………….Ryan?


Sunehra Chand

So Chandramuki, what is your problem?

No, I am Avani.

Ok, Avani, what is it you want? What will make your soul free?

I told you I am done with my story. Why are you bothering me?

Tell about your secret.

Asks who? When did I become public property?Ok, here’s what happened.


Long long ago, not so long ago, my dear neighbor Sunehri bought new TV.

Everyday the show would start at 9 pm or 9:30 pm. Oh why so late? The whole day they are silent. Why this Sunehri has to start her entertainment only so late in the evening. And that too so loudly.

Every day for I don’t remember how many days this went on.

Let me talk to Apartment manager. So what should I do?

Apartment Manager: “Oh don’t talk to them personally. Call the security personnel”

Oh I did. But damn, by the time he came, they reduced the volume.

Called the security personnel few times.

Now they are walking so loudly, switching on the bathroom fan when it’s so late. It’s 11:30 pm, may be they are attending nature’s call. Ok but how long? My nature’s call doesn’t take this long. Are they doing it on purpose? Am I paranoid? May be I am starting to get paranoid.

Oh why Sunehri ‘s activities starts only at night, that too so late. Are they doing it on purpose because I complained about their television? Oh no, may be I am starting to get paranoid.

Then one day late night I am asleep: “THUMP!!!”

This Sunehri …this is on purpose….ok Sunehri “knock knock will you please stop dancing?”

Next day:

Shucks, that’s so bad..I shouldn’t have done that. May be I was paranoid. I feel so bad about myself. Let me go to them and apologize. Anyway today is Ganesha Chaturthi, I have made some offerings to Lord. I put it in a bowl, with some chakli, modak, some fruits, oh there I have made a paper rose flower.

“Knock Knock, hey guys Happy Ganesh chaturthi, I thought of giving this to you”.

Next day, I bought ear plugs and done.

But my guilt and paranoia grew. Even before I realized there’s a river “Sunehra Chand”, lot of tributaries got added to it.

River runs, before it goes underground and disappears.




Chandramukhi on cloud 9

Write more.

What else to write, there’s nothing left.

Oh but you haven’t told your secret Chandramukhi.

Chandramuki? Me? Holy crap? Says who?

That’s the sweetest gift you have got from both the groups.

My my I cannot believe I am Chandramukhi. Nobody’s ever told me. I feel like I am on cloud 9. From which angle do I look like her? Oh ummm it’s definitely not my nose, not my teeth? Holy Moly I am so happy, I can’t believe – Chandramukhi?

May be lean version.

Oh my whatever version, even if I look 10% like her, I am so happy. Can you please tell her I am her big fan. I grew up watching her movies, songs. Send her my kisses and hugs. But I still cannot believe, me and Chandramukhi? Hahaaa… That Chandramukhi who didn’t have any stain?

Well, why don’t you write about it yourself?

Oh but I don’t know what to write. I am so excited to hear I am Chandramukhi that my head has gone kaput. It cannot think of any idea as beautiful as herself. Oh come on where is she and where am I? Has she seen me?


Oh my..why didn’t you tell me when she saw me. I would have done something sweet, may be a flying kiss. From now on, please tell me who sees me when, so I can give them the right expressions they deserve.

So are you happy? How do you feel?

Oh why do you ask? I feel like I won Miss World contest and you guys put me a “silver crown” on my head that’s gone kaput.

So Misscreamelhanilissaintism what’s up?


In the end……..

Oh I am feeling so tired, so low…may be it’s my PMS, hormones… energy in me…

I look in the mirror…yikes….look at my beard…thanks to f**king meditations..i have to shave it….oh gosh look at my nose…look at my teeth…oh I am so skinny….awwwwwwwww….i look soooooooooo……..

but the end it doesn’t even matter…..wipe my tears…sigh

What’s your problem, Kiravani?

I do not want to go public. I do not like being asked too many personal questions.

Everybody has problems. Some “strong people” deal well, others like me fail to deal well with the problem. Anyway I was working with a therapist.

It’s been legally documented (the only thing that is legally documented in fact) and might get leaked when time comes. That’s the gift I gave to Ryan and Mr.Silver jubilee for their house warming ceremony and of course their successful marriage anniversary.

I came to know many of you are super jealous of me. This might be a good news for those of you, time to celebrate over my disastrously failed life, for you need something to remember.

Mr.Silver Jubilee, all your favorite leader washes his hands off this case. You all will carry on.

Who suffered/suffers? Me.

Oh I forgot “Happy Women’s Day” for those of you successful leaders, mothers, daughters, wives, teachers…and of course to ladies who failed like me.

What gift do you want on this day?

I want to be released from this whatever shit it is. I am not able to lead neither a common man’s life nor a celebrity’s life. I am tired of playing dumb charades game with Mr. Silver Jubilee and all of you. I am sick and tired of this mess. Powerful guys don’t release me. None of this is documented and guess what it’s been 4.6 years and no sign of the end. God is surely not fair, you see.